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a Medford Info Central Delusional Parody! of course!
TRANSGENDER SHADY SADIE HAWKINS DAY DANCE - APRIL 32 AT MEDFORD HIGH
Sadie Hawkins Day is an American folk event
and pseudo-holiday originated by Al Capp's classic hillbilly comic
strip, Li'l Abner (1934–1978). This inspired real-world Sadie Hawkins events, the premise of which is that females ask males for a date or dancing.
The practical basis of a real Sadie Hawkins Day is one of simple traditional gender role-reversal.
Women and girls take the initiative by inviting the man or boy of their
choice out on a date—- rare before 1937—- typically to a dance attended
by other bachelors and their assertive dates.
According to the Old Farmer's Almanac, Sadie Hawkins Day has long been celebrated on November 15 of every year.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sadie_Hawkins_Day
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From the office of Roy E. Belson
Superincompetent, Medford High School
April 32, 2016 will be our first annual
Shady Hawkins Day Transgender Dance
It's only $50.00 per couple
Make checks payable to Reprobate Roy's Revolving Account
At 11 PM the guys transitioning into women will ask out
the women transitioning to guys
At 12 midnight we reverse it and the women making the transition to men will ask out the men transition to women.
No gay, lesbian, heterosexual transvestites allowed.
All monies will go to Reprobate Roy's favorite charity.
AT THE EVENT
You can throw tomatoes at Madame Knight, in full drag
for fifty cents a tomato. It's so cheap because we get Knight cheap...he wants to go through the audience taking names that he can congratulate at the city council over the next year and a half as he campaigns at the council for the seat he doesn't deserve
Our good pal - Woburn's own - disgraced ex-officer Stephen LeBert will appear with Woburn's newly-minted "disgraced" Officer Imperioso to hurl epithets and/or threaten to put a hole in your head.
If you are lucky enough to get "threatened," Diane McLeod will be there to write out a ticket. You get to personally put Imperioso and LeBert in a phony jail cell, where they belong anyway.
They will PERSONALLY have to pay the phony tickets with real money which, of course, will go to Reprobate Roy's favorite charity.
Disgraced Officer Imperioso will resurrect his Facebook page, take photos of the Shady Sadie Hawkins Day Transgender Dance and attempt to humiliate you online.
After the dance, so there is no discrimination, all heterosexual and homosexual students and the transgender crowd will be invited to Roy Belson's annual student/teacher naked swim meet.
Imperioso and LeBert will be the lifeguards for this
event...if we can get them out of their phony jail cell where
they could be lip-locked for some time.
At the Student/Teacher Naked Swim Meet Paulette Van der Fruit will be BANNED from the event as we don't want the water in the Medford swimming pool to overflow, same for Clerk Ed Finn, Robert E. Skerry and certainly George Scarpelli. Yes, whales have rights too, but the pool gets extra slippery when ten tons of fun attempt to take up all the space that we need for the other teacher/students in the naked swim meet.
Disgraced accused alleged statutory rapist ex-teacher Jenna Tarabelsi (just try saying that one 5 times fast!!!) will say hi on SKYPE from Italy, flip the bird to the students and blow kisses to Roy E. Belson
It is truly a unique event...and when Mayor Burke and
her husband jump naked into the pool, Assistant Superior Court Clerk Burke will be pouring his own vodka into the water...a huge sacrifice on his part.
Mark the date on your calendar...April 32nd,
Reprobate Roy's Original Sadie Hawkins Day Transgender Dance.
Please attend, Roy needs the money, his rich uncle only
left him 35 million and a huge floor on the Empire State Building
this is a parody
send all lawsuits to Retired Reprobate Attorney David P. Slimy.