Satan Talks To Attorneys Lostborne and Dumbley

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A Medford Information Central Famous Parody

Satan:  Ahhhh....our two newest members, Attorney Mark Dumbley and Attorney Neil Lostborne, visiting right after John Cost Us joined the place that makes Global Warming look like Antartica.  Welcome.

Atty Neil:  Why am I here.  I was the greatest, kindest, most wonderful person on the planet

 Satan: For yourself, yes; for everyone else, not with the social skills of a moron.  Welcome aboard.  How many times did YOU violate your oath?

Atty Dumbley raises his hand out of turn, pulling an Anna Maria Cugno and stepping right in it.

Satan: We'll get to you, Mark, for as you know:  "No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude without finally becoming bewildered as to which may be true”. In Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter, this quote applies to the two main characters of the novel.

https://www.123helpme.com/essay/Two-Faces-in...

 

Atty Dumbley: You must be watching Primal Fear on HBO right now?

Satan: Screw HBO, for 2.99 I can get it for 48 hours on demand.  The demented 19 year old, proving Edward Norton used to be cute, slicing and dicing.  Too gory for me...especially when all I have to do is fry 'em!

 

Attorney Lostborne: Your Excellency, Mr. Satan, which one of us was the most demonic?

 

Satan: I don't discriminate...you were both "equal opportunity slappers" disrespecting all those you were supposed to serve as alleged "public servants."

 

Let's see, You, Lostborne, wouldn't sell your Jag so you took advantage, and Dumbley cheating the taxpayers every Thursday to go and steal from the poor at Somerville District Court.  Robin Hood in Reverse!

 

You both gave the middle finger to the public you wanted to trust you, you took unfair advantage of that public.

Welcome to hell.  You've earned it.

 

Burn away...and excuse me...I see that Kerry creature coming down the chute...it's about time...

 

TO BE CONTINUED