A phone call from upstate New York

1,621,519 @ 5:17 pm  june 6
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stories like this are the reason why

So my girlfriend went to upstate New York to write her memoirs...she took a part-time job in a donut shop and met a man named Tom

Tom calls me and says he is divorcing his wife to marry my girlfriend.  He had money, as rumor has it.

"That's funny, Joe, you're gay and you call her your girlfriend!"

"I am a homosexual, Tom, and she is my girlfriend" I replied, ho hum, with a dash of amusement in the boredom.

Tom replied "I think it's so funny."

"Funny, Tom?  Let me ask.  Do you have a serious heart condition?"

"How did you know?  Why would you ask?"

"Because I'm looking out for you, Tom, and she crossed the line.  She IS my girlfriend and for your sake get as far away as you can.  She told me she wanted to marry you, FXXK you to death and take all your money."

You could hear his jaw drop on the floor of the Donut Shoppe
-----------------------------------
She phones me later:

"Why did you do that?"


JV: "Because sometimes you are incorrigible and this time you really crossed the line."

"Oh."

She took the spanking like bad little schoolboy Mark Rumley when i told him "You!  Sit down" at the Medford Housing Authority before I had Mark thrown off the witness stand.

Probably cost the donut shop a loyal customer but saved his life in the process...what was he doing eating donuts with a heart condition anyway?

Makes ya wanna buy a dozen each for all the fat city councilors over at Demet's ...doesn't it?

File under: and two dozen for the fat "detective"