Tuesday, April 27, 2021

The Mystic Valley P.T.A.

THE MYSTIC VALLEY P.T.A.

read while listening to Loretta Lynn: https://youtu.be/VYvzO91QI-E

Loretta should've known better, Dolly Parton is a pro: https://youtu.be/FIxeFcveiBM

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I have to tell y'all a story 'bout a Mystic Valley rock and roll  jogger

Who got gay bashed on Canal Street and became a most notorious blogger 

He interviews the rich and famous wrote reviews and was handsome and so merry

then he got mean legal letters from the mayor's cousin David Skerry

False allegations that he defamed the crazy loathsome witch Natalia

So he beat her fair and square in court and for revenge released report L'Italien

It turns out the City Council was to meet on every Tuesday night

They found out the blogger's bark not as deadly / as his persistent bite

As he walked up to those racist homophobes you'll recall the things he planned to say

He said I'd like to address the council and the Mystic Valley PTA

*  *  *  *

We'd cross examine Tarabelsi but she's up the river for committing rape

There are complaints on Lebert (but) his threats of murder got him booted 

they're on tape

And fat old George Scarpelli his dirty deeds, he's always looking for a pass

But when he's chaperone with Curtatone your kid gets a bloody broomstick up the ________

Uncle Bob didn't like me he threatened to hit me with a dirty metal pipe

So I published the case Dingolo v Maiocco, on a blog, (not everyone has Skype)

and his nephew such a roly-poly eager beaver fire-breathing dragon 

Delusions of grandeur he'd be mayor but he fell off that damn alcoholic wagon 

The son of an official got no breathalyzer, truck, no gun no keys

someone else we can't mention/ allegedly too busy smashing up Fulton St trees

another jerk kissing babies and often putting on the charm

his son on the roadside with a needle sticking out of his arm

For grandma's ,membership she needs a CORI CHECK and some delicious melon

While Breanna has a vice chair on the school committee, a convicted felon 

The state Rep grabs the midsection of  a councilor / in front of little kids

The finger prints, the devil's marks - there's snapshots and a ton of  sleazy vids

The councilor in question, term limits make for a fun vacation

After I got slugged he did the criminal thing /the real true witness intimidation

He acts so high and mighty but he's just another selfish thieving clod

With Finn, Caraviello, Mackowski (and others) the dirty liars should be facing fraud

Ed Finn, disgraced clerk, won't get a song sung by singer Melanie

He's busy beating up on "fags" and committing an ugly violent felony

Integrity so lacking for the coward always coming up so short

A sissy pansy (under subpoena) the bastard failed to show up in criminal court

Before Jeannie skipped to P-Town she said "Don't ever trust Medford police"

It was just $150.00 bucks for cop Shawn Norton to get his bail and a release

Drunk driving like the other two cops (allegedly) not named in lines above

But Jimmy Lee, on a bloody spree, just looking for some S & M and love

Dr Rabies so disturbed and dumb his days swearing and yelling at the rose

Bette Midler should play him but she wouldn't touch his dirty, filthy clothes

With his white wig and stupidity annoying TV viewers with his talking

Angry hunchbacked liar finds some creepy woman to do the bastard's stalking

You wonder Why the ACCESS in Medford/Malden always on the rocks

With reprobates like Patrick Gordon messing things up just like his old boss Ronny Cox

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to be continued....the city is so corrupt

Can't even write parody because it's all true.  How sick is that?

Jeannie C. Riley, now a born again Christian, is SHOCKED!




Harper Valley P.T.A.

I wanna tell you all the story bout the Harper Valley widow's wife
Who had a teenage daughter who attended Harper Valley Junior High
Well her daughter came home one afternoon and didn't even stop to play
And she said mom I got a note here from the Harper Valley PTA
Well the note said Mrs. Johnson
You're wearin' your dresses way too high
It's reported you've been drinkin' and
A runnin' round with men and goin' wild
And we don't believe you oughta be a
Bringin' up your little girl this way
And it was signed by the secretary Harper Valley PTA
Well it happened that the PTA was gonna meet that very afternoon
And they were sure surprised when Mrs.Johnson
Wore her miniskirt into the room
And as she walked up to the blackboard I can still recall
The words she had to say
She said I'd like to address this meeting of the Harper Valley PTA
Well there's Bobby Taylor sittin'
There and seven times he asked me for a date
And Mrs. Taylor sure seems to use a lotta ice whenever he's away
And Mr. Baker can you tell us why
Your secretary had to leave this town
And shouldn't widow Jones be told to keep
Her window shades all pulled completely down
Well Mr. Harper couldn't be here cause
He stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again
And if you smell Shirley Thompson's
Breath you'll find she's had a little nip of gin
And THEN you have the nerve to tell me
You think that as a mother I'm not fit
Well this is just a little Peyton Place
And you're all Harper Valley hypocrites
No I wouldn't put you on because it
Really did it happened just this way
The day my mama socked it to the Harper Valley PTA
The day my mama socked it to the Harper Valley PTA

Songwriters: Hall, Clement, Wooley
For non-commercial use only.

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