Candidates Night! October 16, 2013 We have the Exclusive

128,787
 

Candidates

Night -           

secretly Taped at Alden Chambers October 12

 

Hear Ye, Hear Ye, this is Dr. William Wood to 

commence the taping of Candidate's Night.

This secret taping will be broadcast on

Wednesday night.  Since no one comes to these

things the audience watching on TV will think

it is live.

 

All union members prepare for the Crescendo.
We'll all applaud Mike McGlynn and tape that

first, Jack Dempsey will edit and broadcast it

at the end of the program.  You can all go home

early if we get a good take.

 
Carolyn Rosen:  My husband is disabled, so if 

he hits anyone during the taping or violates the

by-laws of the Massachusetts Democratic party

we will just blame his illness. This year we are

calling his disability Aphasia.  Note that in your

talking points when he gets nasty and punches

someone on the school committee.

(On cue, Dr. William Wood goes over and punches

George Scarpelli in the gut.)

 

Scarpelli: Why did you do that?

Wood: Because, you deserved a good caning and

your tummy can take it.

(Wood then kicks Scarpelli in the shins, the big

dude buckles over and falls into McGlynn's arms)

Wood: Tonight I am the timekeeper, I have the

Wicked Witch's hourglass from the Wizard of

Oz.

Our first speaker is William Young of the

Medford Housing Authority.  Keep in mind,

when certain outside agitators call us out for

Frank Call: "Did you call me?"

Wood: "Calls us out for using 501c3's to engage

in political speech, even though the politicians

will have great control over the tax-free entities,

just blame my disability.  This year the code word

for my disability is senile autism

Carolyn Rosen:  Aphasia. Aphasia. We decided that

this year it would be Aphasia.

Wood: AUTISM.  You always have to stick your

two cents in, Carolyn.  Autism, not Aphasia. I'm

getting into the part, don't interrupt me.

Wood: Now, I was saying, before I worked with
Tennessee Williams I founded a little group called

The Velvet Underground.  This is when  a young

Andy Warhol was my protege.  I had both

Andy Warhol and Roger Corman in my class when

I was a teacher on Sunset Boulevard, however

Nell Coakley: Put a sock in it, Wood.  I need to

get to Colleens for my Chocolate Sundae Fix, your

resume changes the way I change my hair

Nick Iovino: But, boss, I've never seen you change

your hair?

Nell: Nick, it's an expression.  

Wood: Who brought that talking Jack-o-Lantern

in here?

...to be continued