Inauguration Speech Preview: Befanie Stuccini-Lurke

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10:08 pm

Stephony LUNAcinni Burke's Inauguration ROUGH DRAFT

inauguration preview!

Darth Stephanie's
SCARPELLIBERG ADDRESS

Four Score and Seven Years ago, eighty seven years,  when Jack McGlynn Sr. was but a wee lad, Medford was flourishing.  Now, in 2015, the city looks like Hiroshima after the bomb.

Thanks to Jack's criminal son, Michael J. McGlynn, something we can say on this blog courtesy of the clemency we received from the esteemed "twisted solicitor" when he told a Superior Court judge that this blog is "delusional,"  the facts will be scattered amongst the clouds for you, dear readers, to figure out for yourselfs! (as Madame Knight would say!)  For yourselves as well!!!
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Now, to prove how inclusive I am, we will take questions from people who have never ever spoken to me before.  

First question in this fishbowl
(Stephony sticks her hand into the fishbowl to pull out a question) is from Adeline Coletti.

"Dear Darth Stephanie, I've never met you before, how do I get hired at City Hall."

Oh, that's a good, gooooood question, Adeline. Because you have been so forthright we won't do a CORI check on you, nor will we ask you any tough questions, we are all about INCLUSION.

Go see Reprobate Camuso, my representative, and he will hire you.

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Next...(Stephanie closes her eyes and fishes around in the fishbowl) is from Edward P. "Aaron" Finn-nandez.    

"Dear Mrs. Burke, I was a football player and now at 61 years of age I have a bad temper and a penchant for violence. Does your Administration consider we violent people as part of your inclusion?"

Edward...Yes, Yes, YES!  Heck, when my husband goes around calling people "motherfucker" he means it!   It appears that you're the perfect crooked person to be our new city clerk and leech off of the residents, sitting on your obese backside and not doing a damn thing for the citizens other than conducting wedding ceremonies in Alden Chambers on company time.

Inclusion Works.

(So do Stephanie's delusions, it seems.  She actually thinks that she got the votes AND won the damn election!  She didn't!  The votes were stolen by the firm of Finn and McGlynn, LLC)




TO BE CONTINUED